Tag: Parody

The Extraordinary Spoof

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Tell me what’s wrong with the country today?
 There aren’t enough Christians to hope and pray.
 
 Tell me what you think praying will do?
 Well God hears your call and answers you.
 
 What does he tell to the children with cancer?
 Your God has a plan, that’s my final answer.
 
 How best does he use his omniscience?
 He creates good, that turns evil, kills his son, then laments.
 
 What does he say about all suffering foreseen?
 Heaven awaits and what’s been has been.

How best does he use his omnipotence?
 He creates other religions that misrepresent.
 
 What does faith enable people to do?
 Bomb, rape, skin alive, but there’s also good too.
 
 Why would God create any suffering?
 I don’t know but Heaven sounds rather comforting.
 
 Why did Jesus arrive in the Iron Age?
 The first few billion years were warming up back stage.
 
 Why do the miracles physically not withstand?
 Are you implying it’s a fiction that got out of hand?
 
 Answering questions with questions, when all we need are the facts,
 In the hay day of religion, facts would have led to the axe!

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 Without God how do you explain all that you see?
 I can’t explain EVERYTHING and that’s OK with me.
 
 But then how do you find beauty in all that can be? 
 The beauty is in learning and the quest for discovery.
 
 Are you scared when you die there won’t be something?
 I wasn’t scared before birth and that was just nothing.
 
 Without the holy Bible how can you know what is right?
 Filicide, rape and sodomy don’t set my heartstrings alight.
 
 There’s no harm believing in this for ourselves!
 Unless a fundamentalist, no more than pixies or elves.
 
 Do you want your child to grow to be loving and kind?
 Not from a fear of hell seared in their mind.
 
 You put your faith in science, your position is the same,
 It doesn’t declare all the answers, it’s not the same claim.
 
 I don’t trust Science, how many souls has it saved?
 Science is the only reason you’re not naked in a cave. 
 
 Ghosts are the proof after death there is life?
 Only for ladies in black and ladies in white.
 
 Your position is insufferable you’re a complete know-it-all,
 Yet it is you who claims knowledge that’s infallible.
 
 Your probing offends me you treat my beliefs like a spoof,
 Because your extraordinary claims lack extraordinary proof.
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